Jalapenos and Contacts: It Must Be Thursday

Sam's shriveled lens

I am really writing this post for sympathy because I am not sure I can continue to live in my family feeling that we are completely wacked while everyone around us lives normal, "cray-cray" free lives. Sadly, our crazy is not at all of the glamorous kind. Thursday: contacts and jalapenos. Here goes. Once the kids were all out the door, I made my way around the house picking up the carnage that remained in their bathrooms, bedrooms, and kitchen. I did the typical MOM-ADD thing. I carried a basket of clean clothes up to Maisy's room intending to just put it down. I couldn't find a … [Read more...]

The Talk: How My 14 year-old Left ME Speechless

I talk. A lot. All day. About ALL sorts of things. I talk about breasts, uteruses (or uteri--never sure of the plural on that.) I talk about prostates and PAP smears. In a word, it takes a lot to ruffle my feathers when it comes to matters of the human body and what it's capable of. That is until today. See, even though Chris and I have a 50-50 relationship, there are some things that are "assigned" and not negotiable. He does all the car stuff (especially since the untimely demise of the BMW.) I do all the shoe shopping. It is an agreement that works. In the last year (OK maybe two) Chris … [Read more...]

An Open Letter to My Dying Patient

It has taken me a year to get up the courage to post this letter. I have gotten permission from Debi's family and would like to encourage you ALL to read this letter, start Couch to 5K and run this race with us on September 21, 2014. You have plenty of time. Even if you have never run a foot. Please. Make this your summer to do what you have always wanted to do. Make Debi the reason you do it now. Join Eye of the Tiger Team Debi here. Dear Debi, I just got off the phone with you and can't seem to compose myself. The sound of your tiny 3 year old crying in the background will never … [Read more...]

Casualties of a Poolside Happy Hour

Why? Why not a hat like a normal person?

You may have heard a time or two over the past few days about our weekend at the beach. I told you about the country club/beach chair fiasco. You nodded your heads about our excursion to the actual beach from our comfy cool resort community. But really, it all fell apart in that last couple of hours. Here is the scenario. We were tired and hot and irritated after lugging our seven kids and mountains of crap to and from the beach. We had watched the boys ravage the quiet dining room with folding chairs strapped to their backs. We had listened to a litany of complaints about such "beachy" … [Read more...]

26 Phrases That WILL Break a Beach Loving Mom

I am a beach loving mom. That means I love the beach, I have children, and I have a very bad memory. The following scenario has played out practically without change dozens of times over the years and yet...I keep going to the beach with my kids...because 1. I am desperate and 2. I forget. After an eternity of packing the perfect food, chairs, toys, drinks, mats, towels, goggles, sand-proof speaker, boogie boards, and Wonder Wheeler (which by the way every family really needs TWO of,) we drove 7.5 miles (in 40 minutes) to the beach. We sat in traffic and then sat and waited … [Read more...]